What would your guess be?

As my dining partner and I seated ourselves at the Midlothian Capital Ale House bar, we noticed two empty seats next to the two we were claiming. The seats were empty, but a half-full mixed beverage and a nearly full wine glass were on the bar.

Noticing our curious glances, the couple on the other side of the two empty seats spoke up.

"Don't mind them," the gentlemen said. "Those glasses were there when we sat down, and the people haven't been back."

"I've half a mind to drink the wine myself," the woman exclaimed.

"We don't know where they went," the man added, "but we figure they must have had a fight. Why else would you leave two perfectly good drinks?!"

I laughed and agreed.

Later, I realized so many other legitimate possible reasons.

If you could guess one thing, what would it be? Think about it, then read on.

As I realized one very possible reason - in a bar, man and woman, in haste to leave - I laughed and wondered: would young people jump to my latest conclusion, that they had better things to do, things that they couldn't do in public, while more age-advanced people would be less likely to consider that possibility?

I've done only one poll so far - our young V interns and slightly age-advanced admin assistant guessed emergencies as the reason. When I posed my latest possibility, even the young women agreed that nothing but a real emergency would stop them from finishing their drinks! So far, then, my hypothesis is incorrect.

What was your guess - and are you young, somewhat advanced, or crowned with maturity? Let us know!

The Handshake - What Do You Think?

Is your handshake firm or flaccid? Which do you prefer to receive? Is one really better than the other?

In many cases, a handshake is someone's first impression of you, professionally or socially. Most often we hear that a firm handshake is a sign of strength and confidence, while a limp handshake communicates weakness. Certainly we want to convey an image of confidence in a professional setting.

But do we want to convey a different image in personal settings, say a holiday party or other social event?

Also, are the principles different for women than for men? If we grant that a firm handshake is preferable for a macho man, it okay for a woman to have a soft handshake?

What do YOU think?!

Motorists, Beware of Deer

With the whitetail deer of Virginia entering the breeding season, motorists should be cautiously aware of their movement during this time of year.

From July 1st 2004 until June 30th 2005, Virginia ranked 7th in states with highest number of crashes involving deer. State Farm Insurance rank Virginia 12th in the likelihood of a collision with a deer.

“We want motorist to be aware of the potential of deer crashes during this time of year and provide them with the information that will aid them in the possible prevention of such a crash occurring” said Janet Brooking, Executive Director of Drive Smart Virginia.

These creatures, both male and female, are very unaware of vehicles on the roadways when their animal instincts come into play. Their movements increase and you should be on high alert during dusk and early evening and pre-dawn to mid-morning. Most deer stay within a one-mile radius, but they may venture further in search of members of the opposite sex, food or water. Also remember that deer roam in herds, so where you see one deer, others will be close by.

Here are tips that motorist should remember:

* Drivers should keep their headlights on high beam unless they are meeting another vehicle and keep an ever watchful eye on the edges of the woods and fields next to the highway.

* If a deer is seen entering your vehicle’s path, apply brakes without locking the brakes. You can lose traction and control if you lock-up or slide the tires. This is not a problem for some late model vehicles, which have anti-lock brakes.

* Be aware of posted deer crossings.

* DO NOT SWERVE TO MISS A DEER. You could lose control of your vehicle, strike a tree or ditch bank and overturn, or strike another vehicle. Fatal crashes or injuries during crashes are rare when just a deer is struck.

* Remember that deer often travel together, so if you see one, others may be nearby and ready to dash in front of you.

If you strike a deer, you should contact law enforcement as soon as possible, if the damage is over $1,000.00. A vehicle crash report is required to be submitted to the Department of Motor Vehicles under these circumstances. The deer must be tagged and the driver may keep the deer if so desired. Contacting law enforcement also helps with the notification of the Department of Transportation for disposal of the deer.

ART, MUSIC AND THEATRE FOR HOMELESSNESS AWARENESS WEEK, November 11-17th

In recognition of Homelessness Awareness Week, The Daily Planet invites local businesses, residents and community groups to attend the first annual event series of art, music and theater productions designed to promote greater awareness and understanding of issues surrounding homelessness. On November 15 at The Camel – Richmond’s New Social Oasis, 1621 W. Broad Street, will open its doors at 7:30 pm to host the entertaining and educational artistic series with Slash Coleman, author and playwright of the award winning shows will perform a "Matzo Ball Sampler" - monologues from his various shows including "The Neon Man and Me" and "Slash Coleman has Big Matzo Balls". At 9:30 pm, the VeKams, a Richmond based rock-pop creation, featuring Virgil Jones, Scott Gordon and Karen Shealy with drummer, Mackie Blaylock.

Friday, November 16, The Daily Planet will open its doors to the public, offering facility tours on the hour beginning at 11 am until 2 pm. Everyone is invited to experience the inner-workings of the Daily Planet’s health care, mental health, vision, and dental clinics. This community outreach initiative is designed to increase awareness of The Daily Planet’s holistic approach to serving the homeless, uninsured, and underserved of Greater Richmond.

SPADES: a book without a cover will offer one performance on Saturday, November 17th at 7:30 pm at the The Camel. Suggested donation is $10 with proceeds to benefit Daily Planet. SPADES is a co-authored dramatic work conceived and directed by Dr. Tawnya Pettiford-Wates, a national and international touring artist and is a collection of the life stories and journeys of the people who live on the streets and shelters of our community. SPADES uncovers the reality of how closely the lives of the homeless intersects with the lives we all live everyday. The Camel – Richmond’s New Social Oasis will host Saturday’s performance of SPADES, which will travel to Washington, D.C. to perform at the Kennedy Center for the National Alliance to End Homelessness Awards and Fundraising Gala on April 7, 2008.

Dr. Tawnya Pettiford-Wates is a playwright, director, actor, poet, writer and teacher. She has appeared on Broadway and in both National and International Touring Companies. The play’s producing co-collaborator, Marc Taylor, MA, Ed.S, LPC, is a mental health clinician on the staff of Daily Planet.

V Is for the Birds

Check out this great Web page examining why geese fly in a V formation - and what we can learn from these majestic birds!

Go to the "The Goose Story" to learn from the birds!

Celebrating for Her - But Envious, Too!

Thirty-four-year old Paula Radcliffe won the New York City Marathon on Sunday, beating a very competitive field of women - ten months after the birth of her baby girl!

I celebrate the accomplishment of this British runner unreservedly. Yet when I saw the photo of her flat stomach merely 10 months later, and visualized my wrinkly tummy 22 years after the birth of my twins, I do feel a little envy! I'd never wish her flat stomach away, but would love to have one myself. Ah, well, they're my "love scars"!

I like to make a clear distinction between "envy" and "jealousy." With envy, you want something for yourself, but you wouldn't take it away from someone in order to get it. With jealousy, not only do you want it, but you don't want someone else to have it!

The green-eyed monster of jealousy is often nasty and mean. Envy, on the other hand, can be productive - you congratulate the victor, but work harder to achieve your own success!

In a Runner's World interview, British runner Paula Radcliffe said of her closest competitor in the race, Gete Wami, "I really respect Gete, and I knew that it was going to be tough and I would have to race really, really strong to beat her."

Now that's the spirit of sportsmanship that we can practice in all aspects of life - we race for our best and leave the nasty green-eyed monster behind!

To read more of the interview with Paula, click here.

It Hits the Streets Tomorrow, Nov. 2

This month's issue of V celebrates the phoenix, women who have overcome life's obstacles and risen from the ashes. You'll read the stories of several women who have made lemonade out of their lemons. Sally Wetzler is a whitewater kayaker and kayak instructor to wounded vets - despite needing a wheelchair for the past 20 years. Susan Dunham's biggest fight wasn't just against blindness, but against the blows to her self-esteem from a verbally abusive father and husband. Inspired by the birth of her first daughter, Karen Horn overcame a major weight problem that had plagued her since childhood. Kim Dunham-Quigley's story is both a reminder of the importance of leaving abusive relationships and an inspiration that it can be done. And with the help of a concerned dentist, Mary Helen Baird overcame a nagging physical problem.

Even our Art department is a reminder of the beauty of the phoenix - Richmond Ballet instructor who refuses to let lupus stifle the dance in her life.

You'll also find a focus on women of the Virginia Film Festival; how to conquer headaches without medication; an experience at the National Association of Black Journalists convention; financial advice for women facing divorce; and more!

Be sure to check out our advertisers, too! Without their support, we couldn't support the women of Virginia.

May this month's issue of V empower, enlighten, and entertain you!
To discover where to get your latest issue of V Magazine for Women, go to www.vmagazineforwomen.com/find.html.